There is a red menace north of our borders (no it’s not Canada right-wingers who might be reading this) known as the State of Alaska. However, I prefer to call it by a name that I feel is really more precise and apropos, and that should be the name used to describe it; that name, dear reader, is the U.S.S.R.A. (The United Soviet Socialist Republic of Alaska). This socialist state’s red Governor Sarah Palin in 2007 pushed a gigantic increase in Alaska’s oil profits tax through a Republican-dominated legislature, a machination that brought in $6 billion in new revenue to the Alaskan government’s coffers. The U.S.S.R.A. owns most of the oil-producing land within its borders and was getting upward of 85 percent of its budget from the oil companies that lease the fields, even before Palin helped increase the U.S.S.R.A.’s cut of the state’s oil revenues! Because the U.S.S.R.A. heavily taxes oil companies, the companies get to write off what they pay the U.S.S.R.A. against their federal tax obligation. This leaves the money that the federal government would otherwise have, to be made up for by the citizens of the other 49 good, solid, red, white, and blue blooded 100% capitalistic patriotic American states!

A federal windfalls profits tax, similar to what is done in Alaska, was proposed in Congress by many prominent Democratic legislators, Republicans rejected it, however, saying it would discourage oil companies from investing in boosting oil field yields. John McCain, in particular, criticized the Democrats’ call for a windfall profits tax, saying it would “increase our dependence on foreign oil and hinder exactly the same kind of domestic exploration and production we need.” Sarah Palin’s U.S.S.R.A. obviously rejected this advice that was proffered by John McCain and congressional Republicans, and they decided to, in good Marxian fashion, have the state sector take a prominent role in Alaska’s lucrative oil industry (I thought government was the problem?).

In the U.S.S.R.A., every resident this year will get a $3,200 payout. Since 1982, the Alaska Permanent Fund, which invests oil revenues from state lands, has paid out a dividend on invested oil loot to everyone who has been in the U.S.S.R.A. for at least a year. Not only this, but for every dollar Alaskans pay in federal taxes, they receive $1.84 in return! This redistribution of wealth, this redistributive ‘robbery’, should incense any anti-red patriotic hard working blue (or white) collar American! While the rest of America subsidizes Alaska, its citizens reap the benefits of taxing exorbitant oil company profits! Didn’t the taxpayers of the other states in the union buy Alaska from Russia in the first place? What cut should the rest of us be getting out of this booty that the communistic Alaskans enjoy?

Sarah Palin’s attacks on Barack Obama, during the presidential campaign, could have far more easily been levied against her, and her beloved motherland, the U.S.S.R.A! Perhaps now that the election campaign is over, it could be argued that all of this is moot at this point anyway; but it’s just another example of Republican illogic, and Republicans saying one thing, while doing something else. All the time that they were calling Obama’s tax policies socialistic (which is akin to calling Jamie Moyer, Nolan Ryan), the Republicans were running as their Vice Presidential Nominee the governor of the most socialistic state in the whole grand fifty-state union! The chief executive of the state that would make the Bolshevik Revolution conspirators proud, the United Soviet Socialist Republic of Alaska!

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